Yo. Hey. Hiya. How are ya?!
I really wish you could see my expression right now: I'm pursing my lips, nodding my head, raising my eyebrows, and pacing around with my hands held behind my back as if I have everything "under control."
Hah! What a farse! I have way less under control than it appears; isn't that how we're all walking around?
In fact, are we not all walking around scared shitless that someone is going to see right through us, see us at our core, see us for who we really are...then reject us or take away their love?
So what do we do to avoid having that happen? We hide. We cover ourselves up by throwing on emotional armor. This emotional armor looks a little different for each person, the way a family crest on actual armor would look different for each family (cue scene from Game of Thrones). :p
Here's how my armor usually appears...it doesn't. This can be the trickiest armor of all - the kind that seems as if it's non-existent, yet is there creating an invisible barrier to deep intimacy and true connection.
My closest friends and family have been noticing my armor lately...and they've called me out on it; thank God!
They've asked me: "What are you so afraid of by putting yourself out there, by sharing your message with the world? Are you afraid of failing? Are you afraid of looking a certain way? What's there for you?"
Well folks, here it is: I've been scared out of my mind to really put myself out there - to share my message unapologetically and often, to be seen on video, to post consistently, etc.
If I really put myself out there and it doesn't go "according to plan" (whatever that means), they I've really "failed" (whatever that means). Now that I'm typing this, it seems a bit ridiculous, but this is really what happens in our brains. I invite you to take a peek and see where this might be happening for you - the undefined "failures" that may not exist if you actually try to define them.
Here's what I want to share:I am feeling deeply called right now to guide people toward deeper intimacy with self and others, with a special focus on guiding women toward radical self-expression and sexual freedom. (Know any women that would benefit from this type of work? Send them my way)!
There, I said it! That's my charge...and it's okay if that morphs and shifts and changes over time. None of this is static or set in stone. I say this as much for myself as I do for you. We are ever-changing beings. While focus is important, so too is following your excitement and good-feeling sensations in the body. And right now, I'm feeling mighty excited!
What are you feeling excited about today or in general? Can you create some time to do more of that thing or be with that person or experience more often?
How would the trajectory of your day, week, month, year, life, shift if you allowed yourself to follow the good-feeling feelings? (The sensations in the body that let you know you're in alignment with joy, happiness, abundance, and bliss).
I'll leave ya with all that juiciness. ❤️